- Joined
- May 22, 2008
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Yes, I really do understand how it is for him. It is just as you said - just had to whine last night - mainly because over the years it has sometimes felt like no one gave a crap. I think it sometimes is that HE decides what the problem is and I get sent in to resolve it - even when I think it is something else (and it often is). Perhaps it is that it is EXPECTED that I do his bidding. Too often my mantra is Whatever he wants, whenever he wants, however he wants it. Whine over. Another day has dawned.It is a hard life. Us women folks are tough old birds. We are the stronger one , That I have learned this year. Me with two types of cancer hubby with one. Oh yes he got a clean bill of health today. They got all the cancer. thank God! he does not have to have cemo or radiation. Me I have to live with knowing my cancer cannot be beaten. And have to give up My B&B. that is the harder one for sure. But like all good women we do what we have to do. Do we always like it H--- No!I have no choice - Himself refuses to die. I have to keep on keepin' on until then.WOW 20 years.That is wonderful.
I had hope to go that long also. But life has a way to change things for sure. I hope you can enjoy a few more years also..
He kept hearing a motor running tonight. At 10 PM I get elected to go outside and down into the furnace room to check the sump pump that he thinks is running too long. So he finds a flashlight for me. The door does not want to open so I have to give it a shoulder (these steps down are cement, steep, and no railing. Mud from all our recent downpours is at the bottom of the steps). Sump pump is sitting there doing nothing. Noise starts, I unplug the sump pump. Noise continues. Plug it back in. It is the A/C trying to run. Turned off now. I just love that way it is OK for me to go out and check things at night. At least it was not raining. Thanks for letting kvetch. Right now I am furious. The thought never occurs that I could slip on those steps.
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I admire you getting up and checking things out. At night especially. But do be very care full with dangerous steps .I lived in a house with that darn pump. What a pain. I remember one day it did not work we had water every where. When I came downstairs things we floating. After that we put in all wooden boxes for the machines to be off the floor. it would be alright if the pump decided not to work again.
But having a sister in law who has the same problem as your hubby. I see it is a trap for her. The body just won't do what you want it to do. She feels so trapped. And is angry with life and not being able to do what she would like to do. She feels she can't travel any more. Can't cook or drive or and her love for gardening which she can't do any more. And when they do go out hubby has to take so many things so she can go and not easy to just get up and go. Or see events or places of interest.
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Just called the plumber.