The quandary of emotional blackmail

[Proud Texan]

I feel like to allow him off the hook is much like keeping a dog who bites.
If he gets away with it, it will reinforce in his mind that this is ok or acceptable behavior. Its not. Next month he may do the same thing to another innkeeper using threats and insults to get his way..

deleted.

 

[Don Draper]

Innkeepers who do not stick to there written policies make it difficult for other Innkeepers who do.Had a couple cancel at the last moment and thought I was a pushover like the last Innkeeper they canceled with. I did get the B&B's name (another state) But I charged them according to my policies... no bad Trip Advisor report from them either..and that was 3 yrs ago. Ever time I read about an Innkeeper not adhearing to there policies I know it's just making it hard for an honest Inn to follow its policies. my 2 cents

Mary in Bridgewater..

"just making it hard for an honest Inn to follow its policies"
I don't believe that a policy decision in favor of a guest (or my sanity) makes me somehow dishonest or less honest than an innkeeper who never deviates from published policies.
.

To me it comes across as an innkeeper saying "Well it's my business so I can do what I want"...so if you happen to cur favor with the innkeeper in however you manage to wheedle your request then it's a win for you, the bad guest. But what about those guests who don't cur this favor? What was "wrong" with them that they couldn't be an exception too? Just seems unfair to me. We have policies because we try to treat everyone equally.

 

[Innkeeper To Go]

Innkeepers who do not stick to there written policies make it difficult for other Innkeepers who do.Had a couple cancel at the last moment and thought I was a pushover like the last Innkeeper they canceled with. I did get the B&B's name (another state) But I charged them according to my policies... no bad Trip Advisor report from them either..and that was 3 yrs ago. Ever time I read about an Innkeeper not adhearing to there policies I know it's just making it hard for an honest Inn to follow its policies. my 2 cents

Mary in Bridgewater..

"just making it hard for an honest Inn to follow its policies"
I don't believe that a policy decision in favor of a guest (or my sanity) makes me somehow dishonest or less honest than an innkeeper who never deviates from published policies.
.

To me it comes across as an innkeeper saying "Well it's my business so I can do what I want"...so if you happen to cur favor with the innkeeper in however you manage to wheedle your request then it's a win for you, the bad guest. But what about those guests who don't cur this favor? What was "wrong" with them that they couldn't be an exception too? Just seems unfair to me. We have policies because we try to treat everyone equally.
.

An innkeeper never wants to come across as simply dismissing his/her own policies. A policy that is not enforced is not a policy at all.
And yet, there will always be some exceptions. Only the innkeeper can truly judge what is best for each situation.
When it's my inn, the thing I look at is whether or not I actually had a loss as a result of the cancellation. Did I turn any guests away for those nights? If not, I'm less inclined to charge the fee.
But I also ran an inn with a 100% recommend rating on tripadvisor BECAUSE of the gracious hospitality we provided. I rarely had to charge a fee because I could usually rebook. When I couldn't, I'd take a good hard look at each situation and make a decision as to what made the most sense for the long run.
Did I have guests ignoring my policy? Hardly. Rarely got cancellations and usually had a waiting list to deal with the cancellations we did receive. Ran 81% occupancy in 2008 - and 2009!
So, for me, it worked.
But as for fair, what I keep hearing in this thread is that if the guy had not been such a jerk, then folks might be inclined to give him a break. I fundamentally disagree with that way of managing, much as I can understand the human urge to punish.
I'm not for using policies as a way to show who is the boss. I'm for using policies that will ensure the inn runs smoothly and profitably.
If the reason for charging this guy is because he had a temper tantrum, how is that treating everyone equally? Is the policy to charge guests who have bad manners but not the nice guests?
Innkeepers need to be able to keep a cool head when dealing with explosive guests. This guy was just dumped. Maybe his bad behavior was not his usual behavior.
But truthfully, whatever his behavior, I believe a good manager will always keep an open mind - and a good innkeeper will always have an open heart. Somewhere in that mix, the right decision will always be found.
IMHO, punishment is not in there at all.

 

[Don Draper]

Innkeepers who do not stick to there written policies make it difficult for other Innkeepers who do.Had a couple cancel at the last moment and thought I was a pushover like the last Innkeeper they canceled with. I did get the B&B's name (another state) But I charged them according to my policies... no bad Trip Advisor report from them either..and that was 3 yrs ago. Ever time I read about an Innkeeper not adhearing to there policies I know it's just making it hard for an honest Inn to follow its policies. my 2 cents

Mary in Bridgewater..

"just making it hard for an honest Inn to follow its policies"
I don't believe that a policy decision in favor of a guest (or my sanity) makes me somehow dishonest or less honest than an innkeeper who never deviates from published policies.
.

To me it comes across as an innkeeper saying "Well it's my business so I can do what I want"...so if you happen to cur favor with the innkeeper in however you manage to wheedle your request then it's a win for you, the bad guest. But what about those guests who don't cur this favor? What was "wrong" with them that they couldn't be an exception too? Just seems unfair to me. We have policies because we try to treat everyone equally.
.

An innkeeper never wants to come across as simply dismissing his/her own policies. A policy that is not enforced is not a policy at all.
And yet, there will always be some exceptions. Only the innkeeper can truly judge what is best for each situation.
When it's my inn, the thing I look at is whether or not I actually had a loss as a result of the cancellation. Did I turn any guests away for those nights? If not, I'm less inclined to charge the fee.
But I also ran an inn with a 100% recommend rating on tripadvisor BECAUSE of the gracious hospitality we provided. I rarely had to charge a fee because I could usually rebook. When I couldn't, I'd take a good hard look at each situation and make a decision as to what made the most sense for the long run.
Did I have guests ignoring my policy? Hardly. Rarely got cancellations and usually had a waiting list to deal with the cancellations we did receive. Ran 81% occupancy in 2008 - and 2009!
So, for me, it worked.
But as for fair, what I keep hearing in this thread is that if the guy had not been such a jerk, then folks might be inclined to give him a break. I fundamentally disagree with that way of managing, much as I can understand the human urge to punish.
I'm not for using policies as a way to show who is the boss. I'm for using policies that will ensure the inn runs smoothly and profitably.
If the reason for charging this guy is because he had a temper tantrum, how is that treating everyone equally? Is the policy to charge guests who have bad manners but not the nice guests?
Innkeepers need to be able to keep a cool head when dealing with explosive guests. This guy was just dumped. Maybe his bad behavior was not his usual behavior.
But truthfully, whatever his behavior, I believe a good manager will always keep an open mind - and a good innkeeper will always have an open heart. Somewhere in that mix, the right decision will always be found.
IMHO, punishment is not in there at all.
.

Regardless of your occupancy or the presence of a waiting list, it is all but impossible to rebook a last-minute cancellation, which this was. People have made other plans in the interim, and if you run an occupancy like we do, you've been turning other business away for weeks for any given night. I don't think anyone said they would have "let this guy off the hook" if he'd been nicer...they were saying they would have worried about retaliation less if he'd been better behaved.
The idea of "graciousness" never entered the picture at all, nor the complete irrelevance of any TA rating as judgement of such.

 

[JBloggs]

Actually the opposite is also being expressed, because he is a jerk, let him off and get him out of your hair. Which is what he is trying to do by being a jerk. Some things are simply not worth the grief. We all have our definition pf that and how much is worth all the stress in the end.

 

[Innkeeper To Go]

Innkeepers who do not stick to there written policies make it difficult for other Innkeepers who do.Had a couple cancel at the last moment and thought I was a pushover like the last Innkeeper they canceled with. I did get the B&B's name (another state) But I charged them according to my policies... no bad Trip Advisor report from them either..and that was 3 yrs ago. Ever time I read about an Innkeeper not adhearing to there policies I know it's just making it hard for an honest Inn to follow its policies. my 2 cents

Mary in Bridgewater..

"just making it hard for an honest Inn to follow its policies"
I don't believe that a policy decision in favor of a guest (or my sanity) makes me somehow dishonest or less honest than an innkeeper who never deviates from published policies.
.

To me it comes across as an innkeeper saying "Well it's my business so I can do what I want"...so if you happen to cur favor with the innkeeper in however you manage to wheedle your request then it's a win for you, the bad guest. But what about those guests who don't cur this favor? What was "wrong" with them that they couldn't be an exception too? Just seems unfair to me. We have policies because we try to treat everyone equally.
.

An innkeeper never wants to come across as simply dismissing his/her own policies. A policy that is not enforced is not a policy at all.
And yet, there will always be some exceptions. Only the innkeeper can truly judge what is best for each situation.
When it's my inn, the thing I look at is whether or not I actually had a loss as a result of the cancellation. Did I turn any guests away for those nights? If not, I'm less inclined to charge the fee.
But I also ran an inn with a 100% recommend rating on tripadvisor BECAUSE of the gracious hospitality we provided. I rarely had to charge a fee because I could usually rebook. When I couldn't, I'd take a good hard look at each situation and make a decision as to what made the most sense for the long run.
Did I have guests ignoring my policy? Hardly. Rarely got cancellations and usually had a waiting list to deal with the cancellations we did receive. Ran 81% occupancy in 2008 - and 2009!
So, for me, it worked.
But as for fair, what I keep hearing in this thread is that if the guy had not been such a jerk, then folks might be inclined to give him a break. I fundamentally disagree with that way of managing, much as I can understand the human urge to punish.
I'm not for using policies as a way to show who is the boss. I'm for using policies that will ensure the inn runs smoothly and profitably.
If the reason for charging this guy is because he had a temper tantrum, how is that treating everyone equally? Is the policy to charge guests who have bad manners but not the nice guests?
Innkeepers need to be able to keep a cool head when dealing with explosive guests. This guy was just dumped. Maybe his bad behavior was not his usual behavior.
But truthfully, whatever his behavior, I believe a good manager will always keep an open mind - and a good innkeeper will always have an open heart. Somewhere in that mix, the right decision will always be found.
IMHO, punishment is not in there at all.
.

Regardless of your occupancy or the presence of a waiting list, it is all but impossible to rebook a last-minute cancellation, which this was. People have made other plans in the interim, and if you run an occupancy like we do, you've been turning other business away for weeks for any given night. I don't think anyone said they would have "let this guy off the hook" if he'd been nicer...they were saying they would have worried about retaliation less if he'd been better behaved.
The idea of "graciousness" never entered the picture at all, nor the complete irrelevance of any TA rating as judgement of such.
.

I don't think anyone said they would have "let this guy off the hook" if he'd been nicer...they were saying they would have worried about retaliation less if he'd been better behaved.

You might want to take another look at some of the comments in this thread because they don't really support what you're saying here.
As for irrelevant, no, guest ratings and occupancy levels are not irrelevant. They point to effective policies and good management - or the lack thereof. So, yes, they're quite relevant in a discussion of the impact of a decision - especially when you have someone threatening to do damage to the inn's reputation.
Is the inn's reputation strong enough to handle that? Perhaps. Only the innkeeper knows that.
But I'm guessing that if she were so sure that the decision was the right decision, she wouldn't be looking to this forum for reinforcement or other opinions.
As for graciousness, there is absolutely nothing gracious about accusing other innkeepers of being dishonest because of a disagreement about policy.
Absolutely nothing.

 

[Don Draper]

Innkeepers who do not stick to there written policies make it difficult for other Innkeepers who do.Had a couple cancel at the last moment and thought I was a pushover like the last Innkeeper they canceled with. I did get the B&B's name (another state) But I charged them according to my policies... no bad Trip Advisor report from them either..and that was 3 yrs ago. Ever time I read about an Innkeeper not adhearing to there policies I know it's just making it hard for an honest Inn to follow its policies. my 2 cents

Mary in Bridgewater..

"just making it hard for an honest Inn to follow its policies"
I don't believe that a policy decision in favor of a guest (or my sanity) makes me somehow dishonest or less honest than an innkeeper who never deviates from published policies.
.

To me it comes across as an innkeeper saying "Well it's my business so I can do what I want"...so if you happen to cur favor with the innkeeper in however you manage to wheedle your request then it's a win for you, the bad guest. But what about those guests who don't cur this favor? What was "wrong" with them that they couldn't be an exception too? Just seems unfair to me. We have policies because we try to treat everyone equally.
.

An innkeeper never wants to come across as simply dismissing his/her own policies. A policy that is not enforced is not a policy at all.
And yet, there will always be some exceptions. Only the innkeeper can truly judge what is best for each situation.
When it's my inn, the thing I look at is whether or not I actually had a loss as a result of the cancellation. Did I turn any guests away for those nights? If not, I'm less inclined to charge the fee.
But I also ran an inn with a 100% recommend rating on tripadvisor BECAUSE of the gracious hospitality we provided. I rarely had to charge a fee because I could usually rebook. When I couldn't, I'd take a good hard look at each situation and make a decision as to what made the most sense for the long run.
Did I have guests ignoring my policy? Hardly. Rarely got cancellations and usually had a waiting list to deal with the cancellations we did receive. Ran 81% occupancy in 2008 - and 2009!
So, for me, it worked.
But as for fair, what I keep hearing in this thread is that if the guy had not been such a jerk, then folks might be inclined to give him a break. I fundamentally disagree with that way of managing, much as I can understand the human urge to punish.
I'm not for using policies as a way to show who is the boss. I'm for using policies that will ensure the inn runs smoothly and profitably.
If the reason for charging this guy is because he had a temper tantrum, how is that treating everyone equally? Is the policy to charge guests who have bad manners but not the nice guests?
Innkeepers need to be able to keep a cool head when dealing with explosive guests. This guy was just dumped. Maybe his bad behavior was not his usual behavior.
But truthfully, whatever his behavior, I believe a good manager will always keep an open mind - and a good innkeeper will always have an open heart. Somewhere in that mix, the right decision will always be found.
IMHO, punishment is not in there at all.
.

Regardless of your occupancy or the presence of a waiting list, it is all but impossible to rebook a last-minute cancellation, which this was. People have made other plans in the interim, and if you run an occupancy like we do, you've been turning other business away for weeks for any given night. I don't think anyone said they would have "let this guy off the hook" if he'd been nicer...they were saying they would have worried about retaliation less if he'd been better behaved.
The idea of "graciousness" never entered the picture at all, nor the complete irrelevance of any TA rating as judgement of such.
.

I don't think anyone said they would have "let this guy off the hook" if he'd been nicer...they were saying they would have worried about retaliation less if he'd been better behaved.

You might want to take another look at some of the comments in this thread because they don't really support what you're saying here.
As for irrelevant, no, guest ratings and occupancy levels are not irrelevant. They point to effective policies and good management - or the lack thereof. So, yes, they're quite relevant in a discussion of the impact of a decision - especially when you have someone threatening to do damage to the inn's reputation.
Is the inn's reputation strong enough to handle that? Perhaps. Only the innkeeper knows that.
But I'm guessing that if she were so sure that the decision was the right decision, she wouldn't be looking to this forum for reinforcement or other opinions.
As for graciousness, there is absolutely nothing gracious about accusing other innkeepers of being dishonest because of a disagreement about policy.
Absolutely nothing.
.

Actually, I did not mention any type of "dishonesty" at all, I was merely agreeing with the point that innkeepers who don't follow their own policies aren't doing any other innkeepers any favors. Perhaps I did not make that clear enough, but I could never call someone "dishonest" without having met them or even spoken to them!
FD simply asked what WE would do...as in, she was asking everyone. YOU seem to have made the assumption that she was "looking to this forum for reinforcement". But even if she were, why can't she just get the input from others without all the condescension? I think it's obvious that we all do what works best for our individual properties (especially those of us who are the owners).
I just think there's really no need to go on and on about how superior one's way of doing things is. Just state your preference and let that be that.

 

[Innkeeper To Go]

Innkeepers who do not stick to there written policies make it difficult for other Innkeepers who do.Had a couple cancel at the last moment and thought I was a pushover like the last Innkeeper they canceled with. I did get the B&B's name (another state) But I charged them according to my policies... no bad Trip Advisor report from them either..and that was 3 yrs ago. Ever time I read about an Innkeeper not adhearing to there policies I know it's just making it hard for an honest Inn to follow its policies. my 2 cents

Mary in Bridgewater..

"just making it hard for an honest Inn to follow its policies"
I don't believe that a policy decision in favor of a guest (or my sanity) makes me somehow dishonest or less honest than an innkeeper who never deviates from published policies.
.

To me it comes across as an innkeeper saying "Well it's my business so I can do what I want"...so if you happen to cur favor with the innkeeper in however you manage to wheedle your request then it's a win for you, the bad guest. But what about those guests who don't cur this favor? What was "wrong" with them that they couldn't be an exception too? Just seems unfair to me. We have policies because we try to treat everyone equally.
.

An innkeeper never wants to come across as simply dismissing his/her own policies. A policy that is not enforced is not a policy at all.
And yet, there will always be some exceptions. Only the innkeeper can truly judge what is best for each situation.
When it's my inn, the thing I look at is whether or not I actually had a loss as a result of the cancellation. Did I turn any guests away for those nights? If not, I'm less inclined to charge the fee.
But I also ran an inn with a 100% recommend rating on tripadvisor BECAUSE of the gracious hospitality we provided. I rarely had to charge a fee because I could usually rebook. When I couldn't, I'd take a good hard look at each situation and make a decision as to what made the most sense for the long run.
Did I have guests ignoring my policy? Hardly. Rarely got cancellations and usually had a waiting list to deal with the cancellations we did receive. Ran 81% occupancy in 2008 - and 2009!
So, for me, it worked.
But as for fair, what I keep hearing in this thread is that if the guy had not been such a jerk, then folks might be inclined to give him a break. I fundamentally disagree with that way of managing, much as I can understand the human urge to punish.
I'm not for using policies as a way to show who is the boss. I'm for using policies that will ensure the inn runs smoothly and profitably.
If the reason for charging this guy is because he had a temper tantrum, how is that treating everyone equally? Is the policy to charge guests who have bad manners but not the nice guests?
Innkeepers need to be able to keep a cool head when dealing with explosive guests. This guy was just dumped. Maybe his bad behavior was not his usual behavior.
But truthfully, whatever his behavior, I believe a good manager will always keep an open mind - and a good innkeeper will always have an open heart. Somewhere in that mix, the right decision will always be found.
IMHO, punishment is not in there at all.
.

Regardless of your occupancy or the presence of a waiting list, it is all but impossible to rebook a last-minute cancellation, which this was. People have made other plans in the interim, and if you run an occupancy like we do, you've been turning other business away for weeks for any given night. I don't think anyone said they would have "let this guy off the hook" if he'd been nicer...they were saying they would have worried about retaliation less if he'd been better behaved.
The idea of "graciousness" never entered the picture at all, nor the complete irrelevance of any TA rating as judgement of such.
.

I don't think anyone said they would have "let this guy off the hook" if he'd been nicer...they were saying they would have worried about retaliation less if he'd been better behaved.

You might want to take another look at some of the comments in this thread because they don't really support what you're saying here.
As for irrelevant, no, guest ratings and occupancy levels are not irrelevant. They point to effective policies and good management - or the lack thereof. So, yes, they're quite relevant in a discussion of the impact of a decision - especially when you have someone threatening to do damage to the inn's reputation.
Is the inn's reputation strong enough to handle that? Perhaps. Only the innkeeper knows that.
But I'm guessing that if she were so sure that the decision was the right decision, she wouldn't be looking to this forum for reinforcement or other opinions.
As for graciousness, there is absolutely nothing gracious about accusing other innkeepers of being dishonest because of a disagreement about policy.
Absolutely nothing.
.

Actually, I did not mention any type of "dishonesty" at all, I was merely agreeing with the point that innkeepers who don't follow their own policies aren't doing any other innkeepers any favors. Perhaps I did not make that clear enough, but I could never call someone "dishonest" without having met them or even spoken to them!
FD simply asked what WE would do...as in, she was asking everyone. YOU seem to have made the assumption that she was "looking to this forum for reinforcement". But even if she were, why can't she just get the input from others without all the condescension? I think it's obvious that we all do what works best for our individual properties (especially those of us who are the owners).
I just think there's really no need to go on and on about how superior one's way of doing things is. Just state your preference and let that be that.
.

Actually, what you said Amen to earlier in this thread was this:
"Ever time I read about an Innkeeper not adhearing to there policies I know it's just making it hard for an honest Inn to follow its policies."
As for how superior one's policies are, I agree. I have not said my way of doing things was superior, although I did point to results they achieved.
However, when you agree that the honest inns are those who do it your way, you're really implying something about the inns who do it differently. How is that not a judgement about those inns?
We're all different. FD asked folks what they did and folks responded, including me. I didn't do that to be insulted. I did it to offer FD a different POV, which it seemed she may have been looking for.

 

[Innkeeper To Go]

Actually the opposite is also being expressed, because he is a jerk, let him off and get him out of your hair. Which is what he is trying to do by being a jerk. Some things are simply not worth the grief. We all have our definition pf that and how much is worth all the stress in the end..

Good point

 

[user 26]

maybe he won't retaliate.
'just dumped' is hurt, angry and out some money. and has been dumped. he also vented, big time, on you.
maybe he will cool down, calm down and go away.
maybe he will rant some more.
maybe he will protest the charge.
maybe he will spend his weekend writing all the nasty things he can think of to post about your place. i am trying to think of where these posts could appear. on ta? on b and b.com? do you have google alerts set up so that if your place is mentioned online you can find the post and respond asap?
since your conversation was verbal, document what was said (with as little emotion on your part as possible) so that if negative posts appear you can request that they be removed.
ps ... unless i was able to re-book the room, the charge would stand. and the deposit would be forfeited. yes, i've been known to bend my rules at times, at my discretion, when i choose. being verbally abused would not result in one of those times.

 

[Don Draper]

Innkeepers who do not stick to there written policies make it difficult for other Innkeepers who do.Had a couple cancel at the last moment and thought I was a pushover like the last Innkeeper they canceled with. I did get the B&B's name (another state) But I charged them according to my policies... no bad Trip Advisor report from them either..and that was 3 yrs ago. Ever time I read about an Innkeeper not adhearing to there policies I know it's just making it hard for an honest Inn to follow its policies. my 2 cents

Mary in Bridgewater..

"just making it hard for an honest Inn to follow its policies"
I don't believe that a policy decision in favor of a guest (or my sanity) makes me somehow dishonest or less honest than an innkeeper who never deviates from published policies.
.

To me it comes across as an innkeeper saying "Well it's my business so I can do what I want"...so if you happen to cur favor with the innkeeper in however you manage to wheedle your request then it's a win for you, the bad guest. But what about those guests who don't cur this favor? What was "wrong" with them that they couldn't be an exception too? Just seems unfair to me. We have policies because we try to treat everyone equally.
.

An innkeeper never wants to come across as simply dismissing his/her own policies. A policy that is not enforced is not a policy at all.
And yet, there will always be some exceptions. Only the innkeeper can truly judge what is best for each situation.
When it's my inn, the thing I look at is whether or not I actually had a loss as a result of the cancellation. Did I turn any guests away for those nights? If not, I'm less inclined to charge the fee.
But I also ran an inn with a 100% recommend rating on tripadvisor BECAUSE of the gracious hospitality we provided. I rarely had to charge a fee because I could usually rebook. When I couldn't, I'd take a good hard look at each situation and make a decision as to what made the most sense for the long run.
Did I have guests ignoring my policy? Hardly. Rarely got cancellations and usually had a waiting list to deal with the cancellations we did receive. Ran 81% occupancy in 2008 - and 2009!
So, for me, it worked.
But as for fair, what I keep hearing in this thread is that if the guy had not been such a jerk, then folks might be inclined to give him a break. I fundamentally disagree with that way of managing, much as I can understand the human urge to punish.
I'm not for using policies as a way to show who is the boss. I'm for using policies that will ensure the inn runs smoothly and profitably.
If the reason for charging this guy is because he had a temper tantrum, how is that treating everyone equally? Is the policy to charge guests who have bad manners but not the nice guests?
Innkeepers need to be able to keep a cool head when dealing with explosive guests. This guy was just dumped. Maybe his bad behavior was not his usual behavior.
But truthfully, whatever his behavior, I believe a good manager will always keep an open mind - and a good innkeeper will always have an open heart. Somewhere in that mix, the right decision will always be found.
IMHO, punishment is not in there at all.
.

Regardless of your occupancy or the presence of a waiting list, it is all but impossible to rebook a last-minute cancellation, which this was. People have made other plans in the interim, and if you run an occupancy like we do, you've been turning other business away for weeks for any given night. I don't think anyone said they would have "let this guy off the hook" if he'd been nicer...they were saying they would have worried about retaliation less if he'd been better behaved.
The idea of "graciousness" never entered the picture at all, nor the complete irrelevance of any TA rating as judgement of such.
.

I don't think anyone said they would have "let this guy off the hook" if he'd been nicer...they were saying they would have worried about retaliation less if he'd been better behaved.

You might want to take another look at some of the comments in this thread because they don't really support what you're saying here.
As for irrelevant, no, guest ratings and occupancy levels are not irrelevant. They point to effective policies and good management - or the lack thereof. So, yes, they're quite relevant in a discussion of the impact of a decision - especially when you have someone threatening to do damage to the inn's reputation.
Is the inn's reputation strong enough to handle that? Perhaps. Only the innkeeper knows that.
But I'm guessing that if she were so sure that the decision was the right decision, she wouldn't be looking to this forum for reinforcement or other opinions.
As for graciousness, there is absolutely nothing gracious about accusing other innkeepers of being dishonest because of a disagreement about policy.
Absolutely nothing.
.

Actually, I did not mention any type of "dishonesty" at all, I was merely agreeing with the point that innkeepers who don't follow their own policies aren't doing any other innkeepers any favors. Perhaps I did not make that clear enough, but I could never call someone "dishonest" without having met them or even spoken to them!
FD simply asked what WE would do...as in, she was asking everyone. YOU seem to have made the assumption that she was "looking to this forum for reinforcement". But even if she were, why can't she just get the input from others without all the condescension? I think it's obvious that we all do what works best for our individual properties (especially those of us who are the owners).
I just think there's really no need to go on and on about how superior one's way of doing things is. Just state your preference and let that be that.
.

Actually, what you said Amen to earlier in this thread was this:
"Ever time I read about an Innkeeper not adhearing to there policies I know it's just making it hard for an honest Inn to follow its policies."
As for how superior one's policies are, I agree. I have not said my way of doing things was superior, although I did point to results they achieved.
However, when you agree that the honest inns are those who do it your way, you're really implying something about the inns who do it differently. How is that not a judgement about those inns?
We're all different. FD asked folks what they did and folks responded, including me. I didn't do that to be insulted. I did it to offer FD a different POV, which it seemed she may have been looking for.
.

Nope, was saying Amen to her first sentence, which I then reiterated. Never commented on "dishonesty" at all, just tried to respond to LB's post but it ended up posting after yours. I don't see where you were insulted at any point.

 

[Morticia]

Hope nothing comes of the threat but I was thinking about this. Even if you have a Google alert set up it won't tell you about TA reviews or anything else unless your inn name is mentioned in the review.

 

[EmptyNest]

Hope nothing comes of the threat but I was thinking about this. Even if you have a Google alert set up it won't tell you about TA reviews or anything else unless your inn name is mentioned in the review..

Well there is nothing posted so far on her TA listing...so much for being trashed on line in 48 hours.

 

[Morticia]

Hope nothing comes of the threat but I was thinking about this. Even if you have a Google alert set up it won't tell you about TA reviews or anything else unless your inn name is mentioned in the review..

Well there is nothing posted so far on her TA listing...so much for being trashed on line in 48 hours.
.

Well there is nothing posted so far on her TA listing...so much for being trashed on line in 48 hours.

Wondering how old the person was, assuming 20-30 something and figuring 'trashing' might take on the Twitter, blogging & FB crowd as well as other review sites besides TA.
I've seen a couple of scathing blogs about lodging places that show up if you search on the inn itself. Those don't die or get buried and you can't really respond to them on the writer's turf.

 

[wendydk]

This was interesting reading from Howard Levitan's (Quantum Hospitality) Blog. I especially liked the resulting comments from Eric Goldreyer, April from TripAdvisor, Innkeepers and others.
Do Cancellation Policies Hurt Bed and Breakfasts?

 

[sharpe]

This was interesting reading from Howard Levitan's (Quantum Hospitality) Blog. I especially liked the resulting comments from Eric Goldreyer, April from TripAdvisor, Innkeepers and others.
Do Cancellation Policies Hurt Bed and Breakfasts? .

Normally, we don't take deposits and we have a one week cancellation policy but we don't charge if we can rebook the room. We're pretty flexible and in six years here, we've only had a handful of charges most of which were accepted amicably by the other parties.
But for ten days in August, rooms are over subscribed and scarse as hen's teeth. We learned quickly to take a non-refundable one night deposit and increase the cancellation to two weeks because we would get booked up a year in advance and then face rebooking our rooms the day the cancellation policy kicked in. As it is, we still have to rebook rooms three or four times as corporate groups pull out.
Last year, with four rooms booked seven months in advance, I got the phone call. But this time they wanted their deposit on the four rooms back as well. I explained our policy which they had signed up to but they threatened me with the 1000 lb gorilla and were very very nasty. Long story short... I caved and refunded their card. Life is too short. I knew that I could rebook the rooms anyway.
But I suspected they had found another cheaper accommodation provider and one phone call to the big budget chain hotel/motel down the road proved my point. I cancelled their booking after 4 pm on their day of arrival using the contact details that they had provided me with. The budget hotel even provided me with a cancellation number.

 

[wendydk]

This was interesting reading from Howard Levitan's (Quantum Hospitality) Blog. I especially liked the resulting comments from Eric Goldreyer, April from TripAdvisor, Innkeepers and others.
Do Cancellation Policies Hurt Bed and Breakfasts? .

Normally, we don't take deposits and we have a one week cancellation policy but we don't charge if we can rebook the room. We're pretty flexible and in six years here, we've only had a handful of charges most of which were accepted amicably by the other parties.
But for ten days in August, rooms are over subscribed and scarse as hen's teeth. We learned quickly to take a non-refundable one night deposit and increase the cancellation to two weeks because we would get booked up a year in advance and then face rebooking our rooms the day the cancellation policy kicked in. As it is, we still have to rebook rooms three or four times as corporate groups pull out.
Last year, with four rooms booked seven months in advance, I got the phone call. But this time they wanted their deposit on the four rooms back as well. I explained our policy which they had signed up to but they threatened me with the 1000 lb gorilla and were very very nasty. Long story short... I caved and refunded their card. Life is too short. I knew that I could rebook the rooms anyway.
But I suspected they had found another cheaper accommodation provider and one phone call to the big budget chain hotel/motel down the road proved my point. I cancelled their booking after 4 pm on their day of arrival using the contact details that they had provided me with. The budget hotel even provided me with a cancellation number.
.

But I suspected they had found another cheaper accommodation provider and one phone call to the big budget chain hotel/motel down the road proved my point. I cancelled their booking after 4 pm on their day of arrival using the contact details that they had provided me with. The budget hotel even provided me with a cancellation number.

 

[EmptyNest]

This was interesting reading from Howard Levitan's (Quantum Hospitality) Blog. I especially liked the resulting comments from Eric Goldreyer, April from TripAdvisor, Innkeepers and others.
Do Cancellation Policies Hurt Bed and Breakfasts? .

Normally, we don't take deposits and we have a one week cancellation policy but we don't charge if we can rebook the room. We're pretty flexible and in six years here, we've only had a handful of charges most of which were accepted amicably by the other parties.
But for ten days in August, rooms are over subscribed and scarse as hen's teeth. We learned quickly to take a non-refundable one night deposit and increase the cancellation to two weeks because we would get booked up a year in advance and then face rebooking our rooms the day the cancellation policy kicked in. As it is, we still have to rebook rooms three or four times as corporate groups pull out.
Last year, with four rooms booked seven months in advance, I got the phone call. But this time they wanted their deposit on the four rooms back as well. I explained our policy which they had signed up to but they threatened me with the 1000 lb gorilla and were very very nasty. Long story short... I caved and refunded their card. Life is too short. I knew that I could rebook the rooms anyway.
But I suspected they had found another cheaper accommodation provider and one phone call to the big budget chain hotel/motel down the road proved my point. I cancelled their booking after 4 pm on their day of arrival using the contact details that they had provided me with. The budget hotel even provided me with a cancellation number.
.

But I suspected they had found another cheaper accommodation provider and one phone call to the big budget chain hotel/motel down the road proved my point. I cancelled their booking after 4 pm on their day of arrival using the contact details that they had provided me with. The budget hotel even provided me with a cancellation number.

.

My sentiments exactly. Did I read this correctly???

 

[user 26]

sharpe ~ please clarify ~ are you saying YOU cancelled their reservation with the budget hotel?

 

[EmptyNest]

Yes, but it would take you more time to track them down and not worth wasting your time. Gheeze...what nerve!